By Ed Thompson

Within the last week, I ended up asking the members of a church, “How can you let your pastor know that you appreciate their ministry?”

We celebrate Pastor Appreciation Month in October. Celebrate may be too strong a term, although Hallmark does put out special cards for the occasion. Perhaps like Mother’s Day or Father’s Day, it’s good to do something then, but hopefully you will be showing your mom and your dad as well as your pastor how much you appreciate them throughout the year.

Pastors are not mind readers. They don’t always know what you’re thinking. If you don’t say something, they may interpret your silence as a sign that you don’t really care whether they stay or go. If they’re not sure or if they feel they’re only hearing from negative voices, they will probably start looking for another call. If you like your pastor, if you appreciate their ministry, you should let them know. It’s much easier to keep a pastor you like than it is to find a new pastor.

So how can you let your pastor know that you appreciate their ministry? While the movie Jerry Maguire dealt with sports rather than ministry, the phrase “Show me the money” still seems to apply. Not that pastors are mercenaries or only care about the money. That’s far from the case. But an annual cost of living wage as well as an occasional performance bonus will make a big difference in letting your pastor know that you appreciate their ministry.

Sometimes it’s hard for a church to do that. They may be feeling financially strapped and looking at large utility bills and some significant maintenance issues. I understand that. However, I would be careful about playing the poor card. I can remember as a young pastor being told several times, “Pastor, we’d like to pay you more money, but we can’t afford to do that.” While I recognized that the church was composed of mostly blue-collar members along with some nurses and schoolteachers as well as a large number of retired folks on a “fixed income” (as a pastor that phrase irritated me to no end because unless I padded my mileage reimbursement requests or picked up a few extra funerals or weddings along the way I was on a fixed income too) and I knew that overall money was tight, I nevertheless saw a number of our members spend three months a year in Florida. I saw a few purchase new RVs. I saw a couple of them go on cruises and trips to Hawaii. Plus, there were quite a few who owned “hunting camps.” Now, some of those hunting camps were probably made from sheets of plywood, held together by duct tape, but I suspect there were a few that may have been as nice as or even nicer than their primary residence. Not that I was necessarily begrudging them any of those things, but I had a good idea of how much they were giving to the church and I felt that I was spending more money on my dog than they were putting in the offering plate. You could say that I questioned their stewardship choices.  

To show your pastor your appreciation, you could also give them an extra week of vacation or even just an extra Sunday off. As a pastor, if I wasn’t preaching and didn’t have to prepare a sermon, it almost felt like I had the week off. The advantage to this is it doesn’t have any impact on the dues you pay to the Board of Pension on your pastor’s effective salary. You could also give your pastor money as a book allowance or provide them with dental insurance or eye care coverage.

If your session does this or especially if they choose not to do something special for your pastor, you could also give them a gift. Again, money is always appropriate. So are gift cards for a particular restaurant or store.  To be honest, I’d shy away from giving them anything they’re going to have to dust. I remember someone once gave us a giant fork and spoon set that was made from rattan. While I am willing to give them credit for their good intentions, we had the hardest time trying to figure out what to do with that gift. I think we finally gave it to a nearby church that was having a yard sale the next spring. I assume someone bought it, although I don’t know why they would bother or what they would do with it.

Finally, a Hallmark card is good. A handwritten note is better. Telling your pastor how much you appreciate all they’re doing for your church, especially if you do it sometime other than when you’re going through the receiving line after worship, would also be helpful.  

The more a pastor feels appreciated, the more likely they are to stay. What can you do to help your pastor feel appreciated? You could wait until Pastor Appreciation Month in October to do something.  You could do something now. You could do something now and in October. What message are you sending to your pastor? What message do you intend to send?